The purpose of life

Compassion and the Individual by His Holiness the Fourteenth Dalai Lama

The purpose of life
One great question underlies our experience, whether we think about it consciously or not: What is the purpose of life?I have considered this question and would like to share my thoughts in the hope that they may be of direct, practical benefit to those who read them.
I believe that the purpose of life is to be happy.
From the moment of birth, every human being wants happiness and does not want suffering. Neither social conditioning nor education nor ideology affect this. From the very core of our being, we simply desire contentment. I don't know whether the universe, with its countless galaxies, stars and planets, has a deeper meaning or not, but at the very least, it is clear that we humans who live on this earth face the task of making a happy life for ourselves.
Therefore, it is important to discover what will bring about the greatest degree of happiness.
How to achieve happiness
For a start, it is possible to divide every kind of happiness and suffering into two main categories: mental and physical. Of the two, it is the mind that exerts the greatest influence on most of us. Unless we are either gravely ill or deprived of basic necessities, our physical condition plays a secondary role in life. If the body is content, we virtually ignore it. The mind, however, registers every event, no matter how small. Hence we should devote our most serious efforts to bringing about mental peace. From my own limited experience I have found that the greatest degree of inner tranquillity comes from the development of love and compassion. The more we care for the happiness of others, the greater our own sense of well-being becomes. Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease. This helps remove whatever fears or insecurities we may have and gives us the strength to cope with any obstacles we encounter. It is the ultimate source of success in life.
As long as we live in this world we are bound to encounter problems. If, at such times, we lose hope and become discouraged, we diminish our ability to face difficulties. If, on the other hand, we remember that it is not just ourselves but everyone who has to undergo suffering, this more realistic perspective will increase our determination and capacity to overcome troubles. Indeed, with this attitude, each new obstacle can be seen as yet another valuable opportunity to improve our mind! Thus we can strive gradually to become more compassionate, that is we can develop both genuine sympathy for others' suffering and the will to help remove their pain. As a result, our own serenity and inner strength will increase.
Our need for love
Ultimately, the reason why love and compassion bring the greatest happiness is simply that our nature cherishes them above all else. The need for love lies at the very foundation of human existence. It results from the profound interdependence we all share with one another. However capable and skillful an individual may be, left alone, he or she will not survive. However vigorous and independent one may feel during the most prosperous periods of life, when one is sick or very young or very old, one must depend on the support of others. Interdependence, of course, is a fundamental law of nature. Not only higher forms of life but also many of the smallest insects are social beings who, without any religion, law or education, survive by mutual cooperation based on an innate recognition of their interconnectedness.The most subtle level of material phenomena is also governed by interdependence. All phenomena, from the planet we inhabit to the oceans, clouds, forests and flowers that surround us, arise in dependence upon subtle patterns of energy. Without their proper interaction, they dissolve and decay. It is because our own human existence is so dependent on the help of others that our need for love lies at the very foundation of our existence. Therefore we need a genuine sense of responsibility and a sincere concern for the welfare of others. We have to consider what we human beings really are. We are not like machine-made objects. If we were merely mechanical entities, then machines themselves could alleviate all of our sufferings and fulfil our needs. However, since we are not solely material creatures, it is a mistake to place all our hopes for happiness on external development alone. Instead, we should consider our origins and nature to discover what we require. Leaving aside the complex question of the creation and evolution of our universe, we can at least agree that each of us is the product of our own parents.
In general, our conception took place not just in the context of sexual desire but from our parents' decision to have a child. Such decisions are founded on responsibility and altruism -- the parents' compassionate commitment to care for their child until it is able to take care of itself. Thus, from the very moment of our conception, our parents' love is directly involved in our creation. Moreover, we are completely dependent upon our mother's care from the earliest stages of our growth.
According to some scientists, a pregnant woman's mental state, be it calm or agitated, has a direct physical effect on her unborn child. The expression of love is also very important at the time of birth. Since the very first thing we do is suck milk from our mother's breast, we naturally feel close to her, and she must feel love for us in order to feed us properly; if she feels anger or resentment her milk may not flow freely.Then there is the critical period of brain development from the time of birth up to at least the age of three or four, during which time loving physical contact is the single most important factor for the normal growth of the child.If the child is not held, hugged, cuddled or loved, its development will be impaired and its brain will not mature properly. Since a child cannot survive without the care of others, love is its most important nourishment. The happiness of childhood, the allaying of the child's many fears and the healthy development of its self-confidence all depend directly upon love. Nowadays, many children grow up in unhappy homes. If they do not receive proper affection, in later life they will rarely love their parents and, not infrequently, will find it hard to love others. This is very sad. As children grow older and enter school, their need for support must be met by their teachers. If a teacher not only imparts academic education but also assumes responsibility for preparing students for life, his or her pupils will feel trust and respect and what has been taught will leave an indelible impression on their minds. On the other hand, subjects taught by a teacher who does not show true concern for his or her students' overall well-being will be regarded as temporary and not retained for long.Similarly, if one is sick and being treated in hospital by a doctor who evinces a warm human feeling, one feels at ease and the doctor's desire to give the best possible care is itself curative, irrespective of the degree of his or her technical skill. On the other hand, if one's doctor lacks human feeling and displays an unfriendly expression, impatience or casual disregard, one will feel anxious, even if he or she is the most highly qualified doctor and the disease has been correctly diagnosed and the right medication prescribed. Inevitably, patients' feelings make a difference to the quality and completeness of their recovery.Even when we engage in ordinary conversation in everyday life, if someone speaks with human feeling we enjoy listening, and respond accordingly; the whole conversation becomes interesting, however unimportant the topic may be. On the other hand, if a person speaks coldly or harshly, we feel uneasy and wish for a quick end to the interaction. From the least to the most important event, the affection and respect of others are vital for our happiness.
Recently I met a group of scientists in America who said that the rate of mental illness in their country was quite high around twelve percent of the population. it became clear during our discussion that the main cause of depression was not a lack of material necessities but a deprivation of the affection of others.
So, as you can see from everything I have written so far, one thing seems clear to me: whether or not we are consciously aware of it, from the day we are born, the need for human affection is in our very blood. Even if the affection comes from an animal or someone we would normally consider an enemy, both children and adults will naturally gravitate towards it. I believe that no one is born free from the need for love. And this demonstrates that, although some modern schools of thought seek to do so, human beings cannot be defined as solely physical. No material object, however beautiful or valuable, can make us feel loved, because our deeper identity and true character lie in the subjective nature of the mind. Developing compassionSome of my friends have told me that, while love and compassion are marvelous and good, they are not really very relevant. Our world, they say, is not a place where such beliefs have much influence or power. They claim that anger and hatred are so much a part of human nature that humanity will always be dominated by them. I do not agree.
We humans have existed in our present form for about a hundred thousand years. I believe that if during this time the human mind had been primarily controlled by anger and hatred, our overall population would have decreased. But today, despite all our wars, we find that the human population is greater than ever. This clearly indicates to me that love and compassion predominate in the world. And this is why unpleasant events are "news"; compassionate activities are so much a part of daily life that they are taken for granted and, therefore, largely ignored. So far I have been discussing mainly the mental benefits of compassion, but it contributes to good physical health as well. According to my personal experience, mental stability and physical well-being are directly related.
Without question, anger and agitation make us more susceptible to illness. On the other hand, if the mind is tranquil and occupied with positive thoughts, the body will not easily fall prey to disease. But of course it is also true that we all have an innate self-centeredness that inhibits our love for others.
So, since we desire the true happiness that is brought about by only a calm mind, and since such peace of mind is brought about by only a compassionate attitude, how can we develop this? Obviously, it is not enough for us simply to think about how nice compassion is! We need to make a concerted effort to develop it; we must use all the events of our daily life to transform our thoughts and behavior.First of all, we must be clear about what we mean by compassion. Many forms of compassionate feeling are mixed with desire and attachment. For instance, the love parents feel for their child is often strongly associated with their own emotional needs, so it is not fully compassionate. Again, in marriage, the love between husband and wife -- particularly at the beginning, when each partner still may not know the other's deeper character very well -- depends more on attachment than genuine love. Our desire can be so strong that the person to whom we are attached appears to be good, when in fact he or she is very negative. In addition, we have a tendency to exaggerate small positive qualities. Thus when one partner's attitude changes, the other partner is often disappointed and his or her attitude changes too. This is an indication that love has been motivated more by personal need than by genuine care for the other individual. True compassion is not just an emotional response but a firm commitment founded on reason. Therefore, a truly compassionate attitude towards others does not change even if they behave negatively. Of course, developing this kind of compassion is not at all easy! As a start, let us consider the following facts: Whether people are beautiful and friendly or unattractive and disruptive, ultimately they are human beings, just like oneself. Like oneself, they want happiness and do not want suffering. Furthermore, their right to overcome suffering and be happy is equal to one's own. Now, when you recognize that all beings are equal in both their desire for happiness and their right to obtain it, you automatically feel empathy and closeness for them. Through accustoming your mind to this sense of universal altruism, you develop a feeling of responsibility for others: the wish to help them actively overcome their problems. Nor is this wish selective; it applies equally to all. As long as they are human beings experiencing pleasure and pain just as you do, there is no logical basis to discriminate between them or to alter your concern for them if they behave negatively. Let me emphasize that it is within our power, given patience and time, to develop this kind of compassion. Of course, our self-centeredness, our distinctive attachment to the feeling of an independent, self-existent "I: works fundamentally to inhibit our compassion. Indeed, true compassion can be experienced only when this type of self-grasping is eliminated. But this does not mean that we cannot start and make progress now.
How we can start
We should begin by removing the greatest hindrances to compassion: anger and hatred. As we all know, these are extremely powerful emotions and they can overwhelm our entire mind. Nevertheless, they can be controlled. If, however, they are not, these negative emotions will plague us -- with no extra effort on their part! -- and impede our quest for the happiness of a loving mind. So as a start, it is useful to investigate whether or not anger is of value. Sometimes, when we are discouraged by a difficult situation, anger does seem helpful, appearing to bring with it more energy, confidence and determination. Here, though, we must examine our mental state carefully. While it is true that anger brings extra energy, if we explore the nature of this energy, we discover that it is blind: we cannot be sure whether its result will be positive or negative. This is because anger eclipses the best part of our brain: its rationality. So the energy of anger is almost always unreliable. It can cause an immense amount of destructive, unfortunate behavior. Moreover, if anger increases to the extreme, one becomes like a mad person, acting in ways that are as damaging to oneself as they are to others. It is possible, however, to develop an equally forceful but far more controlled energy with which to handle difficult situations. This controlled energy comes not only from a compassionate attitude, but also from reason and patience. These are the most powerful antidotes to anger. Unfortunately, many people misjudge these qualities as signs of weakness. I believe the opposite to be true: that they are the true signs of inner strength.
Compassion is by nature gentle, peaceful and soft, but it is also very powerful. It is those who easily lose their patience who are insecure and unstable. Thus, to me, the arousal of anger is a direct sign of weakness. So, when a problem first arises, try to remain humble and maintain a sincere attitude and be concerned that the outcome is fair. Of course, others may try to take advantage of you, and if your remaining detached only encourages unjust aggression, adopt a strong stand. This, however, should be done with compassion, and if it is necessary to express your views and take strong countermeasures, do so without anger or ill-intent. You should realize that even though your opponents appear to be harming you, in the end, their destructive activity will damage only themselves. In order to check your own selfish impulse to retaliate, you should recall your desire to practice compassion and assume responsibility for helping prevent the other person from suffering the consequences of his or her acts. Thus, because the measures you employ have been calmly chosen, they will be more effective, more accurate and more forceful. Retaliation based on the blind energy of anger seldom hits the target.
Friends and enemies
I must emphasize again that merely thinking that compassion and reason and patience are good will not be enough to develop them. We must wait for difficulties to arise and then attempt to practice them. And who creates such opportunities? Not our friends, of course, but our enemies. They are the ones who give us the most trouble. So if we truly wish to learn, we should consider enemies to be our best teacher! For a person who cherishes compassion and love, the practice of tolerance is essential, and for that, an enemy is indispensable. So we should feel grateful to our enemies, for it is they who can best help us develop a tranquil mind! Also, it is often the case in both personal and public life, that with a change in circumstances, enemies become friends.So anger and hatred are always harmful, and unless we train our minds and work to reduce their negative force, they will continue to disturb us and disrupt our attempts to develop a calm mind. Anger and hatred are our real enemies. These are the forces we most need to confront and defeat, not the temporary "enemies" who appear intermittently throughout life. Of course, it is natural and right that we all want friends. I often joke that if you really want to be selfish, you should be very altruistic! You should take good care of others, be concerned for their welfare, help them, serve them, make more friends, make more smiles. The result? When you yourself need help, you find plenty of helpers! If, on the other hand, you neglect the happiness of others, in the long term you will be the loser. And is friendship produced through quarrels and anger, jealousy and intense competitiveness? I do not think so. Only affection brings us genuine close friends. In today's materialistic society, if you have money and power, you seem to have many friends. But they are not friends of yours; they are the friends of your money and power. When you lose your wealth and influence, you will find it very difficult to track these people down. The trouble is that when things in the world go well for us, we become confident that we can manage by ourselves and feel we do not need friends, but as our status and health decline, we quickly realize how wrong we were. That is the moment when we learn who is really helpful and who is completely useless. So to prepare for that moment, to make genuine friends who will help us when the need arises, we ourselves must cultivate altruism!
Though sometimes people laugh when I say it, I myself always want more friends. I love smiles. Because of this I have the problem of knowing how to make more friends and how to get more smiles, in particular, genuine smiles. For there are many kinds of smile, such as sarcastic, artificial or diplomatic smiles. Many smiles produce no feeling of satisfaction, and sometimes they can even create suspicion or fear, can't they? But a genuine smile really gives us a feeling of freshness and is, I believe, unique to human beings. If these are the smiles we want, then we ourselves must create the reasons for them to appear.
Compassion and the world
In conclusion, I would like briefly to expand my thoughts beyond the topic of this short piece and make a wider point: individual happiness can contribute in a profound and effective way to the overall improvement of our entire human community. Because we all share an identical need for love, it is possible to feel that anybody we meet, in whatever circumstances, is a brother or sister. No matter how new the face or how different the dress and behavior, there is no significant division between us and other people. It is foolish to dwell on external differences, because our basic natures are the same. Ultimately, humanity is one and this small planet is our only home. If we are to protect this home of ours, each of us needs to experience a vivid sense of universal altruism. It is only this feeling that can remove the self-centered motives that cause people to deceive and misuse one another. If you have a sincere and open heart, you naturally feel self-worth and confidence, and there is no need to be fearful of others. I believe that at every level of society -- familial, tribal, national and international successful world is the growth of compassion. We do not need to become religious, nor do we need to believe in an ideology. All that is necessary is for each of us to develop our good human qualities. I try to treat whoever I meet as an old friend. This gives me a genuine feeling of happiness. It is the time to help create a happier world.

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Buddha Nature

By Jamgon Kongtrul
Toronto, August 8, 1990
Translated by Ken McLeod


The principal reason for my visiting Toronto at this time is to present what is known as the empowerment of Kalachakra, Wheel of Time. This is a preliminary talk on Buddhism, about the Dharma, the teachings of Buddha. What I wish to talk about this evening is a very important teaching from the final cycle of teachings, which come from Buddha Shakyamuni. The principal theme of this cycle of teachings is Buddha Nature.
Generally the teachings of Buddhism, teachings which come down to us from the Buddha Shakyamuni, are extraordinarily profound and extensive. The reason for this spread in both profundity and extent is basically the very varied motivations, temperaments and capabilities of individual people. Some of the teachings, which Buddha presented, were directed towards people very much in the midst of their lay lives, ordinary lives and daily lives. Some were provisional teachings, which were intended to lead a person into a deeper appreciation. Some of the teachings were about how things actually are what we call the definitive or certain sections of the teachings.
This vast body of teachings is generally known these days as the Three Cycles. The first cycle is concerned with the Four Noble Truths. The second cycle is known as Teachings of No Characteristics. The third cycle, which will be our principal focus this evening, is known alternatively as Complete Differentiation or Delineation or perhaps more familiarly as Teachings on Buddha Nature.
The first cycle of teachings which concern themselves with the Four Noble Truths, were basically concerned with an exposition of the suffering and frustration we experience in our lives, a very clear understanding of the frustration and unsatisfactory nature of ordinary experience, existence. Then the Buddha explained more at greater length the basis or source of this dissatisfaction, the causes, basically the emotional motivations which arise in all of us. The process by which those motivations become suffering actually comes to the delineation of the workings of karma, how an action becomes a seed and produces a certain result. From that he demonstrated a way, a path or a way of life which will lead one to become free of suffering, basically how to live in a way which will dissolve the unsatisfactoriness of existence. He showed very clearly how this way would lead to such dissolution of suffering, which became known as nirvana or the transcendence of misery. You see from this that the principal focus of this cycle of teachings is on suffering; its cause, manifestation and its resolution. Because the focus was on suffering, the natural inclination and main message of this teaching was how do we become free of suffering itself.
How do we actually make use of that perspective? What do we actually do to clear away the suffering, frustration and unsatisfactory nature of our lives? Buddha was very careful to distinguish between the experience we have of the world around us and the suffering or frustration in our lives which comes from the way we interpret that experience. It isn't simply the world and what we see, hear, touch and feel that is the actual cause of the lack of satisfaction in our lives, it is much more the way we approach and interact with our experience that is the cause of a lack of satisfaction. The lack of satisfaction comes from a supposition that we always see ourselves as experiencing something. Here we see ourselves as some-thing, which exists in opposition to the world. From this perspective the presence of that sense of ourselves in opposition to the world is the basis of an unsatisfactory experience of life. Buddhism, in its first cycle of teaching, is concerned with examining that sense we have of ourselves as existing in opposition to the world and when we look at it, see that experience can arise without any need for such a sense of self.
Through calming the mind, morality, training the mind, learning how to restrain the mind so that it isn't reacting emotionally and from developing a calmness which allows for the development of insight into actually how the mind works, from all of these we come to an appreciation that the sense of self we feel so strongly that we are, is actually false. An intellectual understanding of this is not by itself sufficient. It is something which must be developed and grow within us until it becomes a functional and operative understanding. This is essentially the method by which one comes to be free from suffering according to this first cycle of teachings.
Generally speaking most people have the impression that religious life or in our context Buddhism, and worldly life or ordinary life are mutually exclusive, they don't have very much to say to each other or very much influence on each other. Furthermore with respect to the teachings of Buddhism, there is the unfortunate impression that Buddhism teaches a way which is to stop all experience so that we cease to experience the world, we block everything. Both of these are quite erroneous, mistaken impressions of Buddhism. In fact the very opposite is much more the case. Buddhism is solely concerned with how to live in a way in which we do not experience life as unsatisfactory or meaningless. It is absolutely focused on how we live not about getting away from life.
For instance as I mentioned before, the first of the Four Noble Truths is the truth of suffering, that life is unsatisfactory. We do experience frustration. This is something, which is relevant to all of us here. This isn't a teaching to get away from things but to pay attention to exactly what our life is made up of and how it is experienced. Rather than thinking of Buddhism as a way in which one leaves or escapes the suffering, the approach in Buddhism is much more to understand suffering and what it means to be unsatisfactory. When we really understand what it means to be unsatisfactory, where this unsatisfactoriness comes from and what the source is, then we know what to focus our attention on. This is to remove the source of the unsatisfactoriness from our experience. The source of this unsatisfactoriness according to Buddha's teaching is in the negative emotions we feel.
One of the principal ways that we remove these is through the development of a very clear ethical approach to life. We take into account what we refer to as the workings of karma, which means that we appreciate how all of our actions are seed and the actions themselves condition us to experience a certain result. If the actions are negative, the result we experience will be painful. Buddhism, far from teaching us to flee from life or to escape life, actually is much more concerned with leading us to understand of what our life consists, of what suffering consists; where it comes from and what we can actually do about it. This first cycle of teachings is really concerned with understanding the unsatisfactoriness of our life and how to resolve this.
The second cycle of teachings is known as Being Without Signs or Characteristics. It is concerned with what our experience is actually made of, what are all these things we experience, how are they in themselves? When we look at how they are, we see that the way they are is fundamentally different from the way in which we conceive of them being. That is, if we look at any particular phenomena that we experience, even the smallest most insignificant thing, we see that it is made up of many other factors which have come together to make that particular object a possibility to experience. This suggests very strongly that there is no object there, it is simply the product of many different conditions.
However we do not see it as a product of many different factors and conditions, we simply see it as an independent object. We are particularly predisposed to seeing it as an independent object because we feel that we ourselves have some substantial existence. This is what is known in Buddhism as the clinging to a sense of an individual self. We see ourselves in opposition to the world and having made ourselves into some-thing, we then proceed to make everything that makes up the world into other things. This is what is known as the self of phenomena or the self, which we impute to all experience.
When we look at what we actually experience, we see that we simply experience the coming together of many different factors, many different conditions. Nothing has any existence in its own right. This is the essential teaching of the second cycle of the teachings of Buddha.
Now we have to be very careful here because many misconceptions arise at this point. One might feel in saying that there is no actual object means that nothing exists. This would be quite a serious mistake because these teachings do not say that nothing exists and they do not say that something exists. In Buddhism we call the view that nothing exists nihilism and the view that something exists as substantiation or in a slightly different context eternalism, something really exists forever. The view here according to the second cycle of the teachings is neither eternalism nor nihilism. That is, we feel from our subjective experience that something really exists but when we look, see that all we experience is merely the result of many different factors. It can't be the case that something really exists. On the other hand if we say nothing exists, we are confronted immediately by our own experience, something is going on. We can't say that nothing exists.
The point here is to come to an understanding that neither existence nor non-existence is an accurate description of our world. This is why it is termed the Great Middle Way because it goes between all philosophically extreme positions. The way in which we practice this is by developing what is known as awakening mind; awakening to our relationship to the world and awakening to the way the world is. Emptiness is awakening to the way the world is and awakening to our relationship to the world is compassion. So we have loving kindness, compassion and awakening mind being key principals in the second cycle of teachings.
Many of you may have heard of the term emptiness and wondered what this referred to. It is a key principal but it needs to be understood in exactly how it works and its role in this cycle of teaching. We can not understand a concept such as emptiness simply through intellectual reasoning or application of our intellect in any way. No matter how much we may reason philosophically, no matter what logic we may be able to apply, the way we see and experience the world will still be in terms of existence. This is contrary to the way the world actually is. On the other hand we might feel that emptiness refers to nothing, there being nothing. The emptiness in a box for instance, nothing in the box. In this way we feel that nothing is going on and we try to understand that, try to understand the world this way. This would even be a greater mistake for it is directly contradicted by our own experience.
The point here is that emptiness refers to a middle way. Emptiness doesn't simply mean absence or nothing. There is a very wonderful capability or quality, which arises with the understanding of emptiness. This is what we know as Bodhicitta or awakening mind. This is the natural manifestation of the compassion and concern for others, which comes with the appreciation of the ineffable nature of phenomena. The main theme of this second cycle of the teaching is not that nothing exists, not that something exists, it's that our experience is beyond any conceptualization. When we actually begin to experience the world and ourselves from that point of view, we find ourselves awakening to a very rich and wonderful engagement with the world which is characterized by compassion and gentleness.
In the first cycle of teachings it was taught that life is unsatisfactory and the Four Noble Truths which help us understand the nature of that unsatisfactoriness and how to resolve it. In the second cycle of teachings we are taught that our experience can not be characterized by the extremes of eternalism and nihilism.
In the third cycle of teachings we are concerned with Buddha Nature. We find a very important and wonderful teaching being presented. Every sentient being is not fundamentally different from an awakened Buddha. Every sentient being has what we term Buddha Nature. Now this does not mean that there is some thing inside each of us, which is what we might call Buddha Nature and could grow into a Buddha. The idea that there might be some thing inside us of this kind was eliminated according to the teachings of the second cycle.
However, what this idea of Buddha Nature refers to is nothing else than what we actually are. At this point we exist with a great deal of confusion. The teachings on Buddha Nature suggest that confusion, the emotional disturbances, the pain and distortion of our experience are all incidental impurities and are not fundamentally what we are. What Buddha Nature refers to specifically is what is left over when all the confusion of ordinary experience is cleared away; the clear, empty, open mind, which is no thing in itself. This clear, empty, open mind is in no way different from the mind of the Buddha, of a fully awakened individual and means that we ourselves are no different from Buddha except due to the presence of incidental impurities.
According to these teachings there is no difference between Buddha Nature and awakening mind, which was mentioned in association with the second cycle of the teachings. Awakening mind, which is awakening to how the world is, and Buddha Nature, which is the potential for awakening, are not two different things. They are very closely related. One of the principals of awakening mind is a compassionate attitude towards the world. You will notice that some people are naturally compassionate and it doesn't matter who approaches them, everyone likes them and feels comfortable with them and trusts them. This kind of spontaneous trust, inspiration and calming of emotions indicates in the person we are talking about, the presence of Buddha Nature or awakening mind, whichever way we wish to look at it. If we now consider a person who is naturally angry by nature, what these teachings say is that the anger isn't the fundamental nature of the individual, that the anger is the product of incidental impurities. These can be cleared away.
According to the third cycle of the teachings everybody has the Buddha Nature. Everybody has this potential to awaken. As individuals there is no fundamental distinction, difference or basis of discrimination present in any of us. There is no basis to discriminate between one person and another since we all fundamentally have this same nature, Buddha Nature. The only difference among us is the extent to which that nature is manifest or not. The more impurities or confusion that we have, the less that nature manifests. The task then becomes one of enabling that Buddha Nature to manifest fully in our lives. The way in which we do this is go back to the first cycle of the teachings where it talks about karma, how we act, what we actually do on a day-to-day basis. Learning ethical restraint, how to do good and how to avoid evil helps this Buddha Nature to manifest. We can also look to the second cycle of the teachings which is concerned principally with the development of love, compassion and the two aspects of awakening mind; awakening to our relationship to the world and to how the world is. It is through the practices of these that we come to clear away our own confusion so that our own true nature is actually present in the world.
Questions (Inaudible)
The point here is not an explanation of why there are the incidental impurities but an explanation of how we experience things now. The incidental impurities are an expression of ignorance, of not knowing. Ignorance or not knowing refers to the lack of experiential understanding, direct understanding, of how we are. Due to this lack of understanding being present, we do not perceive the world or ourselves accurately. While our essential nature is empty and clear, this lack of understanding causes us to perceive emptiness as some thing, which we take to be a self. It sees the clarity, which arises in the mind as something else, which causes us to experience other. This gives rise to duality and it is this lack of understanding and this propensity towards duality, which are the stuff of which the incidental impurities arise.
We learn how to practice and may spend considerable time in retreat. How do we join what we practice with how we actually live? Our practice is best when it permeates every aspect of our lives and everything that we do. Everything, which we experience, becomes an opportunity. Every interaction we have with another individual is an opportunity to practice not being self-centered or regarding the world as originating with oneself, able to acknowledge the needs and feelings of another person. Of everything we learn how to practice, this is what it is intended to be used for.
By study and reflection on the teachings, one will come to some understanding of emptiness. A direct understanding arises when there is no longer an experience of something being understood apart from what is understood. The whole topic of emptiness needs to be approached with a great deal of caution because there are so many misunderstandings. People take emptiness and make it into something, which is one form of misunderstanding. Emptiness can be conceptualized and applied to everything, which is another misunderstanding. This requires careful study and training in order to be able to use. It is very important that one has access to and relies upon an actual teacher who can guide you in this area.
Many people feel that if one dispenses with clinging then one won't have any relationships. This is not what happens. The clinging which is present in a relationship is the basis for the problems, which may arise in the relationship. As one becomes clearer and freer from clinging, the relationship becomes deeper and closer and less problematic.
At the time of death when the structures of consciousness begin to disintegrate, we experience what we actually are which is Buddha Nature. This is in the first intermediary state following the death process. If an individual has trained during their life and had some experience of this, then at that time they become completely free as they realize their own nature.


Colophon

This text was transcribed by Phil Lecso, using tapes from Karma Kargyu Center in Toronto.

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WORKING WITH DELUSIONAL EMOTIONS

"Delusions are states of mind which, when they arise within our mental continuum, leave us disturbed, confused and unhappy. Therefore, those states of mind which delude or afflict us are called 'delusions' or 'afflictive emotions'."His Holiness the Dalai Lama

THE FEELING AGGREGATE
"Monks, there are beings who suffer not from disease of body for 1 year, for 2 years... even for 100 years. But it is hard to find in the world beings who can admit freedom from mental disease even for 1 moment, save only those who have destroyed delusions." The Buddha [Anguttara Nikaya (A.II:143); Samyutta Nikaya (S.III.:2)]
As mentioned in the page on Rebirth, Buddhist psychology describes four Mental Aggregates: Feeling, Discrimination, Primary Consciousnesses (5 senses and mental awareness) and the other aspects, gathered as the Compositional Factors.
The Feeling Aggregate is defined as 'an omnipresent factor of the mind which labels experiences into three categories: pleasant, unpleasant or neutral': - When the label of pleasant is given to an object, we develop attachment. - When the label of unpleasant is given to an object, we develop aversion, and sometimes even anger or hatred. - When the label of neutral is given to an object, we often don't care about the object or even ignore it.
The process of labelling by the Feeling Aggregate usually only takes a fraction of a second. After applying the label, we tend to create a static opinion and image of the object in our mind. At this stage, the seed for prejudice is usually planted. Once we have established the opinion that something is pleasant or unpleasant, we often need a large amount of evidence before we are willing to change our mind - that is, if we are prepared to change our mind at all. Once we labelled an object unpleasant or bad, it appears as if the object is all bad by itself, as if badness is an inherent quality. We may label a person "bad", but the friends of this person would certainly not agree! Therefore, we need to realise that "good" and "bad" are merely subjective opinions of our mind, and the opinion is often founded on nothing more than a first glance and an almost automatic label. Things and people change quicker than our labels! Everyone tends to prejudice. Labelling is a convenient way to quickly make some sense of our surrounding world by categorising things in being "good" or "bad" to us. The main problem is that we tend to react to the world merely via these (over) simplified labels.
A practical example to reflect on would be medicines: most of them are poisonous in a large dose, but can still be healing in small doses. Every living being requires salt to live, but try eating half a kilo of it, and no doctor can prevent your speedy death.
From Chagdud Rinpoche's 'Gates to Buddhist Practice':
"To understand how delusion arises, practice watching your mind. Begin by simply letting it relax. Without thinking of the past or the future, without feeling hope or fear about this thing or that, let it rest comfortably, open and natural. In this space of the mind, there is no problem, no suffering. Then something catches your attention--an image, a sound, a smell. Your mind splits into inner and outer, self and other, subject and object. In simply perceiving the object, there is still no problem. But when you zero in on it, you notice that it's big or small, white or black, square or circular; and then you make a judgment-- for example, whether it's pretty or ugly. Having made that judgment, you react to it: you decide you like it or don't like it. That's when the problem starts, because "I like it" leads to "I want it." We want to possess what we perceive to be desirable. Similarly, "I don't like it" leads to "I don't want it." If we like something, want it, and can't have it, we suffer. If we don't want it, but can't keep it away, again we suffer. Our suffering seems to occur because of the object of our desire or aversion, but that's not really so -- it happens because the mind splits into object-subject duality and becomes involved in wanting or not wanting something. We often think the only way to create happiness is to try to control the outer circumstances of our lives, to try to fix what seems wrong or to get rid of everything that bothers us. But the real problem lies in our reaction to those circumstances. What we have to change is the mind and the way it experiences reality."

SOME NOTES ON HABITUATION
On top of the above problems related to labelling, the aspect of habituation comes in to reinforce our opinions and prejudices. Strictly spoken, habituation is not negative; in fact it can be extremely positive. Note that the Tibetan word for meditation means "habituation". However, within the context of problematic emotions, habituation can cause exponential growth of problems. If we just look at the results of racial and religious discrimination and hatred, it is sadly obvious how extreme opinions can arise and create havoc, simply because they have become habitual. Once something is a habit, we do not question our behaviour anymore, it becomes automatic and extremely hard to change.
A story by the Buddha to illustrate habituation and the resulting closed-mindedness:
"A young widower, who loved his five year old son very much, was away on business when bandits came who burned down the whole village and took his son away. When the man returned, he saw the ruins and panicked. The took the burnt corpse of an infant to be his son and cried uncontrollably. He organised a cremation ceremony, collected the ashes and put them in a beautiful little bag which he always kept with him. Soon afterwards, his real son escaped from the bandits and found his way home. He arrived at his father's new cottage at midnight and knocked at the door. The father, still grieving asked: "Who is it?" The child answered, it is me papa, open the door!" But in his agitated state of mind, convinced his son was dead, the father thought that some young boy was making fun of him. He shouted: "Go away" and continued to cry. After some time, the child left. Father and son never saw each other again." After this story, the Buddha said: "Sometime, somewhere, you take something to be the truth. If you cling to it so much, even when the truth comes in person and knocks on your door, you will not open it."
Or, in terms of our general attitude, His Holiness the Dalai Lama notes in "Beyond Dogma - The Challenge of the Modern World":
"We all know that on days when we are in a good mood, when the whole world seems to be smiling at us, we can accept predicaments or bad news more easily than if our mind is already upset, frustrated or troubled, when the slightest incident might cause us to explode with negative emotions. If we make a habit of being governed by these negative emotions, we will lose our appetite, sleep badly, perhaps become ill, and lose a few years of our life as a result. So mental calmness is very important."

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THE THREE POISONS
The three most important negative mental attitudes or delusional emotions are called the Three Poisons, these are anger, attachment and ignorance. Underlying all negative emotions are one or more of these three, with ignorance at the bases of all negative emotions (see also the page on mind). Ignorance here, mainly refers to the Buddhist concept of lack of wisdom, or insight into the actual way that things exist.
His Holiness the 7th Dalai Lama (from 'Songs of spiritual change' translated by Glenn Mullin) wrote on attachment and anger:
"Merchants come from the north and south,To gather in the trading center;But after three days have passed,Each goes his separate way.Meeting for but a flash in time,They should avoid fights and fancies.
Hooked by karmas from previous lives,Love and hatred run fierce,But soon we all go our own ways,And each takes his suited rebirth.Right now abandon interpersonal discriminationMade on the basis of attachment and aversion."

HOW TO TRANSFORM NEGATIVE EMOTIONS
Poisonous By Jeniffer Edwards
Why cling to the arrows shot at you? Insults Wounds Time heals you see. Why hold so tightly Do these things define you? Do these things set you free? Why inject yourself with these poisons of the mind Anxiety Greed Anger Despair Why not let them go Set them free. Accept the choices you have And your responsibilities. Accept all that is, rather than "as it should be" For what does define "you" What will set you free What if you never find great meaning What if, in not clinging, You find stillness Calm Honesty Health Peace
In the Tibetan tradition, the most basic method to rid ourselves of negative emotions is via analytical meditation. The reasoning is that the negative emotions are delusions - misunderstandings of reality. If one analyses the process of how they come about, we can discover where real problem lies. Analytical meditation appears a very good method, as one avoids emotional excitement in meditation, and very calm observation of the workings of our own mind usually presents answers quite easily.
So, simply by being calm and quiet, analyse what is behind these destructive emotions and learn where the fault really lies. In Buddhism, the fault never lies ultimately with the outside world! As all our positive and negative experiences are results of our own karma, only our failure to behave more positive causes all our problems.
The biggest obstacle to rid ourselves of these delusions is habituation. Although it is possible to analyse afterwards why it may have been unjust to become angry at someone, it is not simple to stop oneself before anger comes up. More pages on specific negative emotions and how to deal with them are given under the heading of Delusional Emotions in the top left corner of this page. The 'Summary' page describes the general approach in detail.
It should be noted that the ultimate antidote to negative emotions is the wisdom of emptiness. As all distinctions of 'self' and 'other' vanish with this realisation, when all duality vanishes, things like good and bad, or pleasant and unpleasant become meaningless. Due to the way our mind works, it is quite difficult to make this wisdom 'breakthrough', and analytical meditation is a good starter to work on our day-to-day negative emotions and actions.
"This is the radical discovery of Buddhist psychology. You don't have to resign yourself to ordinary suffering, to being always unconscious of what is really going on, helpless before not only society and space and time and others, but more importantly before your own inner drives, impulses and demands. You need not give up and allow yourself to be buffetted here and there by passions and angers. You can become conscious of what you were formerly unconscious. You can understand your drives, see where they come from, block the source, and divert the energy for your own use. You can resist all imperatives and learn to wield the underlying energies. You can reclaim those energies for your life, for your happiness and the happiness of your loved ones."Robert Thurman from "Anger"
In the way that a gardener knows how to transform compost into flowers, we can learn the art of transforming anger, depression,and racial discrimination into love and understanding.This is the work of meditation.Thich Nhat Hanh from "Touching Peace"
Instead of analysis, one can also learn to deal with negative/problematic emotions by practicing awareness of them, for a brief introduction see eg. the introductory article The Second Arrow: The Practice of Emotional Awareness, by Ken Jones. In fact this is a form of Vipassana whereby one focuses on emotions and feelings rather than eg. the sensations of the body. The basic instruction is simple: 'just observe', but to actually do that is a different story altogether, as we need to stay on the subject and not end up in endless conversations with ourselves. These kind of awareness practices form a major part of the Theravada tradition (with which I have limited experience, and therefore cannot elaborate much about).

WHAT IS MEDITATION?

"It is extremely hard to rest undistracted in the nature of mind, even for a moment, let alone to self-liberate a single thought or emotion as it rises. We often assume that simply because we understand something intellectually, - or think we do - we have actually realised it. This is a great delusion. It requires the maturity that only years of listening, contemplation, reflection, meditation, and sustained practice can ripen." Sogyal Rinpoche
INTRODUCTION
Words directed at Westerners from Sogyal Rinpoche's book The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying:
"We are so addicted to looking outside ourselves, that we have lost access to our inner being almost completely. We are terrified to look inward, because our culture has given us no idea of what to find. We may even think that if we meditate, we will be in danger of madness. This is one of the last and most resourceful ploys of the ego to prevent us from discovering our real nature. So, we make our lives so hectic that we eliminate the slightest risk of looking into ourselves..... In a world dedicated to distraction, silence and stillness terrify us."
Please realise that these pages just deal with Buddhist meditation, some techniques are found exclusively in Tibetan Buddhism. The Tibetan word for meditation, "gom" can be translated as familiarising, habituating. In short, it means to familiarise with a positive state of mind, which actually refers to training the mind. Meditation is not just relaxing, rather it is trying to develop a highly concentrated and clear state of mind which one can use for clear analysis, and which can be blissful to be in. This blissful state is called "Shamatha" in Sanskrit (see below). Once we have reached this very advanced concentrated state of mind, we can learn what we want very quickly, including transforming our mind and developing deep wisdom and insight. Not only our conscious thoughts can be brought under control, also our emotions and 'unconsciousness', as they are all based on concepts which can be changed.
This page refelects my own limited understanding of meditation, but do also have a look at His Holiness the Dalai Lama's advice and this lovely summary of What meditation is not from Bhante Henepola Gunarantana.
WORKING WITH THE MIND
In Buddhist meditation, we try to develop wisdom, learn to observe our own mind, decrease negative mind states and develop positive mind states. To develop wisdom and insight, we need a calm, clear and concentrated mind. To observe our own mind, we need to develop a kind of inner "spy" - a part of our attention that checks our state of mind. To decrease negative mind states we need to understand where they come from and transform them into positive energy with the wisdom developed from observing our own mind. To develop positive mind states, we need to focus away from selfishness and again develop wisdom by observing our own mind. As you may realise from the above, we should actually become our own psychologist, or like the title of a booklet by Lama Yeshe: "Becoming Your Own Therapist".
In order to find the right state of mind for meditation, we need concentration instead of being scattered, and clarity of mind instead of dullness. We need to observe our own thoughts and mind states instead of getting lost in emotions or becoming prejudiced. We need to be honest towards ourselves instead of fooling ourselves and walk away from unpleasant problems. Furthermore, we need to be patient (one does not become a meditation master over night), generate self-acceptance, confidence and enthusiasm to make the mind peaceful. All these factors need to be in balance: we need to be somewhat relaxed as well as concentrated, we need to avoid both sleepiness and excitement.
A quote from the late Lama Yeshe:
"Many meditators emphasise too much on concentration: if you are squeezing, then there is no control of anger if someone disturbs you. The beauty of real meditation is, that even if you are disturbed, you can allow space and time for this."
Another misunderstanding about meditation is that we should stop thinking. I assume this comes from the emphasis in many Zen schools to "stop thinking" - which I understand to mean that one cannot realise or experience emptiness when being only caught up in conceptual thoughts about it. That would be similar to trying to experience a beautiful sunset while discussing with yourself, "Is it the colour of the clouds that make it beautiful, or is it the quietness; why does the sun turn red etc."
As Allan Wallace writes in Tibetan Buddhism from the Ground Up:
"The point of Buddhist meditation is not to stop thinking, for ... cultivation of insight clearly requires intelligent use of thought and discrimination. What needs to be stopped is conceptualisation that is compulsive, mechanical and unintelligent, that is, activity that is always fatiguing, usually pointless, and at times seriously harmful."
Or, as the late Ajahn Chah said:
"Try to be mindful, and let things take their natural course. Then your mind will become still in any surroundings, like a clear forest pool. All kinds of wonderful, rare animals will come to drink at the pool, and you will clearly see the nature of all things. But you will be still. This is the happiness of the Buddha."
But can we change our mind just like that? His Holiness the Dalai Lama explains in 'An Open Heart: Practicing Compassion in Everyday Life':
"Though not physical, our states of mind also come about by causes and conditions, much the way things in the physical world do. It is therefore important to develop familiarity with the mechanics of causation. The substantial cause of our present state of mind is the previous moment of mind. Thus, each moment of consciousness serves as the substantial cause of our subsequent awareness. The stimuli experienced by us, visual forms we enjoy or memories we a react to, are the cooperative conditions that give our state of mind its character. As with matter, by controlling the conditions, we affect the product: our mind. Meditation should be a skillful method of doing just this, applying particular conditions to our minds in order to bring about the desired effect, a more virtuous mind."

CALM ABIDING, SHAMATHA (samatha)
The definition of shamatha is: the ability to hold our minds on the object of meditation with clarity and stability for as long as we wish, conjoined with mental and physical pliancy. It is also called single pointed concentration. With shamatha, the mind becomes extremely flexible and drastically reduces the power of disturbing attitudes, gross anger, attachment, jealousy etc. do not arise.
"People learning the way should first empty and quiet their minds. This is because the mind must be empty before it can mystically understand the subtle principle. If the mind is not emptied, it is like a lamp in the wind, or like turbulent water, how can it reflect the myriad forms?"Yuan-hsien (1618-1697) - Excerpted from "The Teaching of Zen" edited by Thomas Cleary
Prerequisites to achieve full-blown calm abiding:
1. Agreeable place: easy to obtain food without wrong livelihood, powerful place (blessed by holy persons) and quiet, not disease-ridden, proper companions and one should have heard and studied the teachings. 2. Have few desires in terms of food, clothes etc. 3. Knowing satisfaction: acceptance of what you haven and who you are. 4. Pure ethics: try to prevent any negative actions. 5. Forsaking commotion/excitement: few purposes outside meditation, reduce any other activities 6. Abandoning thoughts of desire and lust: contemplating faults of desire and impermanence.
As you may understand from the above, the achievement of shamatha is not a small task. It is said that if one is completely focused on the practice in solitary retreat, some people can achieve it in 6 months. There are not many people around who can claim to have mastered shamatha. To seriously engage in this practice, the advice of a teacher should be sought, and several good books have appeared on the subject.
A warning from Venerable Ajahn Chah (Pra Bhodinyana Thera):
"Samadhi is capable of bringing much harm or much benefit to the meditator, you can't say it brings only one or the other. For one who has no wisdom it is harmful, but for one who has wisdom it can bring real benefit, it can lead him to Insight. That which can be most harmful to the meditator is Absorption Samadhi (Jhana), the samadhi with deep, sustained calm. This samadhi brings great peace. Where there is peace, there is happiness. When there is happiness, attachment and clinging to that happiness arise. The meditator doesn't want to contemplate anything else, he just wants to indulge in that pleasant feeling. When we have been practicing for a long time we may become adept at entering this samadhi very quickly. As soon as we start to note our meditation object, the mind enters calm, and we don't want to come out to investigate anything. We just get stuck on that happiness. This is a danger to one who is practicing meditation.
We must use Upacara Samadhi. Here, we enter calm and then, when the mind is sufficiently calm, we come out and look at outer activity. Looking at the outside with a calm mind gives rise to wisdom. This is hard to understand, because it's almost like ordinary thinking and imagining. When thinking is there, we may think the mind isn't peaceful, but actually that thinking is taking place within the calm. There is contemplation but it doesn't disturb the calm. We may bring thinking up in order to contemplate it. Here we take up the thinking to investigate it, it's not that we are aimlessly thinking to investigate it, it's not that we are aimlessly thinking or guessing away; it's something that arises from a peaceful mind. This is called "awareness within calm and calm within awareness." If it's simply ordinary thinking and imagining, the mind won't be peaceful, it will be disturbed. But I am not talking about ordinary thinking, this is a feeling that arises from the peaceful mind. It's called "contemplation." Wisdom is born right here."
Tai Situ Rinpoche, from 'The Third Karmapa's Mahamudra Prayer':
"'The waves of gross and subtle thoughts subside in their own place.The stream of mind rests unmoved in itself.May we be free from the stains of agitation, stupor, and dullness,And establish a still ocean of calm abiding'
This prayer describes the ideal state of calm abiding. In this state all gross and subtle thoughts are naturally pacified, which is to say that they are temporarily calmed down. When the mind is free from any disturbing thoughts, it becomes stable and abides in this state without there being any need for deliberate effort. In this situation two things can happen. The first is agitation (Tib. 'jing wa'). This refers to an extroverted state in which the mind, figuratively speaking, falls into a gaze, in which it is very fascinated or 'spaced out'. The second consists of two types of an extremely introverted state of mind, stupor and dullness (Tib. 'mug pa' and 'nyog pa'). These are almost the same, though dullness is slightly more active, while under the influence of stupor one might easily fall asleep. It is a state of real blankness, while dullness is a state of extreme cloudiness that can be compared to water polluted by so much dirt that one cannot see through it."

SPECIAL INSIGHT, VIPASYANA (vipassana)
Vipashyana is defined as: the correct discernment of the object of meditation, coupled with single-pointed concentration: a combination of analytical meditation and calm abiding. To develop it, we need to learn to analyse the meditation object. But not only conceptual; it is a more fully understanding the object. Our conceptual understanding will eventually turn into direct, non-conceptual experience. As the Buddha said:
"Like fire arises from two pieces of wood rubbed together, so does analytical wisdom arise from the conceptual state. And just like the fire increases and burns away all the wood, analytical wisdom increases and burns away all conceptual states."
2 Types of analytical meditation are distinguished:
1. To transform our attitude. For example, by understanding the problems and misunderstanding of anger, we can reduce and ultimately eliminate anger. 2. Analysis of the meditation object to understand and perceive it directly.
When doing analytical meditation, never take for granted the first quick answer that comes up. When you ask "why, how and when" again regarding your initial answers, you may discover the "real", underlying answers. Also, the answers should not only come just from the intellect, also check your feelings and emotions, as long as you don't get caught up in them..
An example: in death meditation you can think of death. When you ask, "Will I die?" the immediate answer will be "Yes", and it seems you are finished. But take some time to check with yourself if you really live your life consciously in the realisation that you can die any minute. Asking yourself, "How would it feel to die right now?" will get you into another level of the mind. Ask, "How will I die?" and "How will I feel?" and the simple question about death becomes intensely acute and serious.Then ask for example, "Why will I die?" and you may answer, "Negative karma". But rather than giving just the textbook answers, check how these things feel: "What is negative karma really? How does negative karma feel? Do I really believe in karma, and do I act that way?" etc. Analytical meditation is not just about giving the instant logical answers from the books, but verifying what your OWN answers are. For me personally, often the real answers appear to be stowed away in emotions and is hiding behind the logical straightforward answers.
After doing the analysis in a very slow and calm way, one should single-pointedly focus on the conclusion made in the end, without analysis, just "look at the conclusion". This really works to let your own conclusions "sink in", and make them part of your understanding and wisdom.
As example using above meditation, you may conclude that you are really not so sure whether you believe in karma. The conclusion may well be something like: "I have to check about karma more" or "I need to check why I often don't act as if I believe in karma". Personally, this is the kind of stuff that makes me more sensitive and aware about my state of mind, and it stimulates to meditate more on the subjects of philosophy and psychology.
For the complete text of "Mindfulness In Plain English", a well-loved 'how-to meditate' book on Vipassana by Venerable Gunaratana, click here on this page of realization.org.
COMBINING SHAMATHA AND VIPASYANA
According to the Buddha and the many great masters following in his footsteps, we need to practice both single-pointed concentration and special insight. Slightly edited from http://geocities.com/dhammapada2all/:
"In the Anguttara Nikaya Sutta (4.170): Venerable Ananda (one of the main disciples of the Buddha) says that monks and nuns who informed him that they had attained arahantship all declared that they did so by one of the four categories, i.e. there are only these four ways to arahantship (liberation):
o Samatha followed by vipassana - after which the path is born in him/her,o Vipassana followed by samatha - after which the path is born in him/her,o Samatha and vipassana together, simultaneously - after which the path is born in him/her, ando The mind stands fixed internally (i.e. on the cognizant consciousness or 'self') until it becomes one-pointed - after which the path is born in him/her.
... Charity (dana) and morality (sila) are the positive and negative aspects of doing good (actively doing good and refraining from doing bad actions.). Likewise, samatha and vipassana can be said to be the positive and negative aspects of meditation. Samatha is the positive aspect which brings one closer to Nibbana. Vipassana is the negative aspect, because one sees everything in the world as it is with proper wisdom thus: 'This is not mine, this I am not, this is not my self' -- as a result, one will naturally withdraw from and let go of the sensory world. In other words, samatha meditation pulls one towards Nibbana, in contrast to vipassana meditation, which pushes one away from the world."
Or, as found in text from the Ming Dynasty by an unknown master; Taoist Meditation – Methods for Cultivation a Healthy Mind and Body, translated by Thomas Cleary :
"When you see reality, no illusions can confuse you; when you develop stability, things cannot shake it or take it away."

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BEHAVIOUR IN DAILY LIFE

"Do not commit any unwholesome actions, Accumulate virtuous deeds, Tame and train your own mind."Shakyamuni Buddha

WHY LEAD A SPIRITUAL LIFE?

Once the Buddha addressed his diciples thus: "Monks, it may be that ascetics belonging to other sects will ask you what is the purpose of leading a spiritual life under the Buddha.?" The monks remained silent. Then the Buddha himself gave the answer: "You should answer them: it is to understand things that should be fully understood that we lead a spiritual life under the Buddha. So what things should be fully understood? They are the five aggregates of clinging: material form, feeling, perceptions, mental formations and consciousness." From this incident we can see that the path laid down by the Buddha is essentially a path of understanding. The understanding aimed at is not merely conceptual knowledge or a collection of information. Rather, it is an insight into the true nature of our existence. This understanding brings liberation, the release of the mind from all bonds and fetters and issues in the cessation of suffering (Dukkha). The Buddha offers us the teachings (Dhamma) as a search light that we can focus on our own experience, in order to understand it in correct perspective. To understand our experience or our existence, involves two steps:
We have to look into the makeup of our being to see what our existence consists of, we have to take it apart mentally, to see how it works, then put it together again and see how it holds together.
We have to examine our experience in order to discover its most pervasive features, the universal characteristics of phenomena.
From: The True Nature of Existence - By Bhikkhu Bodhi (slightly edited)
COMMON SENSE
The basis of Buddhist practice is not merely sitting in silent meditation, but common sense. If we behave arrogant and selfish, what can we expect from the people around us? A nice explanation from Taming the Mind by Thubten Chodron:
"After your morning meditation, have breakfast. Greeting your family in the morning is also part of Dharma practice. Many people are grumpy in the morning. They sit at the breakfast table, pouring over the newspaper or reading the back of the cereal box for the umpteenth time. When their bright-eyed children greet them, they grunt and, without looking up, keep reading. When their partner asks them a question, they don't respond, or they glance at them for a moment with a look that says, "Don't bother me." Later, they wonder why they have problems in the family! .... It's easy to bark orders at your children, "Get up!" "Brush your teeth!" "Why are you wearing that? It looks terrible! Change clothes!" "Stop playing around and eat breakfast." "Hurry up and get to school. You're late." Many children will react as unruly subordinates when treated in this way. But if you greet your children with love and firmly help them navigate everything in their morning routine, they'll be happier and so will you."
His Holiness the Dalai Lama from A Policy of Kindness:
When we practice, initially, as a basis we control ourselves, stopping the bad actions which hurt others as much as we can. This is defensive. After that, when we develop certain qualifications, then as an active goal we should help others. In the first stage, sometimes we need isolation while pursuing our own inner development; however, after you have some confidence, some strength, you must remain with, contact, and serve society in any field -- health, education, politics, or whatever.
There are people who call themselves religious-minded, trying to show this by dressing in a peculiar manner, maintaining a peculiar way of life, and isolating themselves from the rest of society. That is wrong. A scripture of mind-purification (mind-training) says, "Transform your inner viewpoint, but leave your external appearance as it is." This is important. Because the very purpose of practicing the Great Vehicle is service for others, you should not isolate yourselves from society. In order to serve, in order to help, you must remain in society.
ETHICS AND VOWS
Many of us may be hesitant to read about ethics and morality, but according to Buddhism, our lack of self-control is the very thing that leads to our problems. Hopefully, the large amount of rules and vows will not stop you to investigate what they are all about; they should not just be accepted and followed, they must be understood and then you may automatically find yourself living according to them.
The main practice in Buddhism evolves around transformation of one's own mind. The main means to accomplish this is via meditation as one needs to know the 'enemy' inside before one can efficiently subdue it. However, without the causes for positive results in terms of karma, spiritual progress is impossible. For example, you may plan to do a meditation retreat, but you fall sick instead because of some negative karma ripening, and no retreat will happen at all. Hence, the practice of ethics and positive behaviour prevents us from creating negative karma and will enable our spiritual progress.
Ethical behaviour is said to be at the basis of any spiritual path. A life filled with killing, stealing and lying is certainly not very conducive to inner peace and the generation of compassion. The Buddha explained the 8-Fold Noble Path (correct thought, speech, actions, livelihood, understanding, effort, mindfulness and concentration) as a guideline to proper conduct. If you desire to achieve Buddhahood in order to help all others, then you can also try the practices of a Bodhisattva: the 6 Perfections ( the perfection of giving, ethics, patience, effort, concentration and wisdom).
In other pages of this website more details can be found on the various sets of Buddhist vows (see the pages on Refuge, Sangha, Compassion, Mahayana Precepts and Tantra). Vows are intended to keep ones' mind focussed on mindfulness of our mental and physical actions. Moreover, keeping to vows creates a large store of positive energy (karma) which allows progress on the spiritual path. For example, if one does not kill without having taken a vow, one simply does not create any karma. However, when one has taken a vow not to kill, one accumulates positive karma 24 hours a day, as long as one does not kill.
The bottom line for all these practices is to control our mind and intentions; to change our behaviour into not harming others, but helping them instead.
"Conquer the angry man by love. Conquer the ill-natured man by goodness. Conquer the miser with generosity. Conquer the liar with truth." The Buddha (The Dhammapada)

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Joke About Blowjobs

Caught By the Kid

A little boy walks into his parents’ room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dress's quickly and goes to find him. The son sees his mom and asks' "What were you and dad doing?"
The mother replies "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it."
"You're wasting your time." says the boy.
"Why is that?" asked him mom, puzzled.
"Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up."

The Difference between Potential and Reality

A teenager comes home from school with a writing assignment. He asks his father for help. "Dad, can you tell me the difference between potential and reality?"
His father looks up, thoughtfully, and then says, "I'll display it to you. Go ask your mother if she would give Robert Redford a blowjob and swallow his cum for a million dollars. Then go ask your sister if she would give Brad Pitt a blowjob with a sticky facial for a million dollars. Then come back and tell me what you've learned."The kid is puzzled, but he decides to see if he can figure out what his father means. He asks his mother, "Mom, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you give Robert Redford a blowjob and swallow his cum?" His mother looks around slyly, and then with a little smile on her face says, "Don't tell your father, but, yes, I would."
Then he goes to his sister’s room and asks her, "Sis, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you give Brad Pitt a blowjob and let him cum on your face?" His sister looks up and says, "Omigod! Definitely!"
The kid goes back to his father and says, "Dad, I think I've figured it out. Potentially, we're sitting on two million bucks, but in reality, we're living with a couple of sluts.”

The Hotdog Blowjob Trick

One night these two men wanted to go out for drinks, but they didn't have any money. The first man said, "No problem. I have an idea".
So the two proceeded to the closest bar and ordered their drinks. The second man finally asks, "Now what's your plan?"
The first man said, "I'm gonna put this hot dog down my pants and then you unzip me and suck the hot dog right before we have to pay the bill. Once the staff sees this, we will be thrown out of the bar for sure."
The second man was unsure but agreed. As soon as the bill came he dropped to his knees and began to suck. His plan worked. After the 2 men were spotted, they were quickly thrown out of the bar. They proceeded to do this all night in bars all over town without ever having to pay.
Finally the second man said, "Man, I'm drunk enough. That was a great plan."
The first man said "Yea it was, but I lost the hot dog three doors back." Laughing.

Horrible Road Head Accident

In an appalling blowjob accident, a man had his penis severed when he hit a tree while his wife was giving him a blowjob while he was driving their car.
His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn't cover the surgery, since it was considered cosmetic. He said the cost would be $4,500 for "small", $9,500 for "medium" or $16,000 for "large".
The guy thought he'd get a medium or large, but the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision.
The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options. The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected.
"Well, what have the two of you decided?" asked the doctor.
The man answered, "She'd rather remodel the kitchen".

Blowjob That'll Make Her Scream

There were these three guys outside of a bar. There was a black guy, a white guy, and a chinese guy. They all had been in the bar before and saw this gorgeous woman.Well they made a bet to see who could make the woman scream.
The black guy goes in a comes out and the women is laughing, and then the white guys goes in, well after he comes out she is laughing even harder.
The chinese guy goes in and a after a few minutes she is screaming bloody murder. Then he comes out, and the other two guys said how did you do that, and the chinese guy goes "Me chinese, me play trick, me put hot sauce on my dick!"


Busy Night for the Local Hookers

Two hookers were standing on a street corner ready for a night of business.
"It's gonna be a good night tonight, I can tell" says one of the girls.
"How can you tell?" says the other.
"I can smell cock in the air" replies the first hooker.
"Sorry", her friend replied, " I just burped!"


Don't Touch The Birdy

One day there was this man that went to a beach completely naked even though the beach was a non-nude beach.
But the man thought and thought looking around. Nobody is here so he doesn't care. He takes off his towel and lays down with a newspaper to cover his privates just in case.
Soon comes a little girl that asks "Sir, what's under the newspaper?"The man replies with "it's a birdy and never ever touch it."
He soon falls asleep.
Later on when he wakes up, he's in the hospital feeling immense pain around his private area. The doctors ask what happened and all he could remember was the girl at the beach.
Later on the cops arrive at her house asking what she had done. She said "well I was playing with the birdy but then it spit this white stuff at me. I got really mad. So I broke its neck, stepped on its eggs, and burned its nest."


The Wealthy Hooker
One day a man went on a business trip to Florida.
He had seen this hooker and he asked "How much for a hand job?"
The hooker replied "100 Bucks"
The man said "100 Bucks, That's a lot of got damn money"
So the hooker pulled him to the side and said "See that Mercedes, I paid for that by giving hand jobs."
So he gave her the money and received the best hand he had ever had.
The next day he sees her and asks "How much for a blowjob?"She said "200 dollars"
"200 dollars that's a lot of money"
She pulled him to the side and said "You see that yacht by the pier, I paid for that yacht by giving blowjobs."
So he gives her the money, and get the best head job of his life
On his last day in Florida he returns to the hooker and says "The hand job was good, the head job was great how much for the whole package."
"1000 dollars'
"1000 dollars that's a lot of god damn money"
So she pulled him to side and said "You see that island, I could afford that if i had a pussy."


Making Good on Her Promises
A woman recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home. One day she picked up the urn he was in and poured him out on the counter.Then she started talking to him, and tracing her fingers in the ashes, she said, "You know that fur coat you promised me, Irving?" She answered by saying, "I bought it with the insurance money!"
She then said, “Irving, remember that new car you promised me?" She answered again saying, "Well, I bought it with the insurance money!"
Still tracing her finger in the ashes, she said, “Irving, remember that blowjob I promised you? Here it comes …


Blowjob on the Green
There were three men waiting to tee off at hole #1 when a beautiful lady walked up to them and asked if she could join them, and of course they said yes!
She was putting for an even round on 18. She had about a 50 foot put for par. She turned and asked the guys, "Who ever give me the correct way to put this, I will give them a blowjob."
So the first guy says "Just putt it straight and it will go in!" She said nope!
The next guy says, "Put it to the right, and it will slant home!" She said no!
The last guy walks up and says, "Looks like a gimme to me..."


The Cabbie and the Blowjob

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round trip ticket -- If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting.
He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money from home, he offered him his credit card numbers, his drivers license number, his address, etc. but to no avail. The cabbie said (adopt appropriate dialect), "If you don't have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!" So the businessman was forced to hitch-hike to the airport and was barely in time to catch his flight.
One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain his financial success, returned to Vegas and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to get a cab ride back to the airport.
Well who should he see out there, at the end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride when he was down on his luck. The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make the guy pay for his lack of charity, and he hit on a plan.
The businessman got in the first cab in the line, "How much for a ride to the airport," he asked? "Fifteen bucks," came the reply. "And how much for you to give me a blowjob on the way?" "What?! Get the hell out of my cab." The businessman got into the back of each cab in the long line and asked the same questions, with the same result.
When he got to his old friend at the back of the line, he got in and asked "How much for a ride to the airport?" The cabbie replied "fifteen bucks." The businessman said "ok" and off they went. Then, as the drove slowly past the long line of cabs the businessman gave a big smile and thumbs up sign to each driver.

Lost Sperm

One day two Sperms were swimming vigorously and one Sperm asks the other: "How much further do we have until we reach the egg??"
The other Sperm replies:
“I dunno, but I think we just passed the tonsils!!”


Time to Celebrate

Man walks into a bar and orders six double bourbons and the barman asks the man what his troubles were.
"No troubles", said the customer "In fact I am celebrating".
"Celebrating what?" asked the barman.
"I have just had my first blowjob". came the reply.
"In that case let me give you a seventh double on the house" replied the barman.
"No Thanks", said the man "If six don't get rid of the taste nothing will!"

Birds and Bees

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in."Mother, where do babies come from?"
The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, "Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug and have sex."
The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, "That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy's vagina. That's how you get a baby, honey." The child seems to comprehend.
"Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy's penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?"
"Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry".

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